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Responding to Those Who Stare
It never used to bother me that people would stare when I was wearing my supplemental oxygen in public. I know how unusual it is to see someone in their thirties requiring oxygen to breathe! However, there are still moments that catching the eyes of those starring at me causes my blood to boil.
While I was travelling last week, it became obvious to the friends I was with just how many people would stare at me. Both friends asked me if this is something I notice, to which I confirmed it was and that it has been happening for a long time, unfortunately. There were moments on my trip that I used a wheelchair because my legs and lungs were just too tired, and after flying, I was pretty dependent on my portable oxygen concentrator (POC). I ended up wearing it most of my vacation, which I was fine with but it did mean increased stares in public places like the mall, airport or hotel.
Do you notice people starring at you since starting to use supplemental oxygen or physical aids, such as a wheelchair or walker?
If so, how do you respond to those stares?
Most of the time, I try to catch the eye of the person starring and offer up a smile. I actually want them to know that they don’t have to pity me, and this also lets them know that I am aware of their stares. This is how I respond on a good day. However, on my tougher days, the stares can cause me to feel frustrated, angry or even emotional. It is on those days that I never really know how I want to respond.
- Perhaps I could use the stares as an opportunity to educate others about my lung disease.
- Perhaps I could address the stares, reminding adults that it is not polite to stare nor is it okay to allow your children to do so.
- Perhaps I could even just ignore it, pretending I don’t see people looking at me as I lug my POC/tanks around or require a wheelchair for excessive walking.
How I respond often depends on how I feel in that moment. Can you relate to this as well?
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